An eye for an envelope...? (Backdated a couple days)

[have_your_lives]

[Schuldig has been slowly - much more so than he'd like - recuperating from the wounds Nagi gave him during his teammate's run-in with Raven's Blood, and probably low-level harassing everyone in his house into the bargain. (Not nearly up to his usual standards, but it's unwise to make anyone too violent toward you while you can't walk without limping.) However, news of a package having arrived for him in the mail is enough to get him up off the couch. Ema, like a properly intimidated person, was too afraid to keep it from him and so left it on the kitchen table.

He opens it to find...an eyeball. It's not the most gruesome thing he's ever seen by a long shot, but the rather eerie familiarity of the color throws him off for a moment -

- until it vanishes before his one eye, and suddenly he's got two to work with again. He can feel it underneath the bandages, even though he has to rip those off before he can confirm that yes, he's got depth perception back and everything.

Have some very smug cackling, housemates. And, shortly, over the phone, too.]

Who's better off now, Nagi? You're still as hairless as an infant, aren't you~?

[Unfiltered because why would he ever want to filter this. Nagi may disagree, but Schuldig at his cockiest does not care for such insignificant details. Also, he's had a few weeks to forget the matter of prudence when teasing someone who can throw things at your head from behind even when he's standing right in front of you.]

Comments

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

[Oh he doesn't even bother saying anything on the phone - he just heads right over to Schuldig's house, lets himself in, and flings a chair right at his head.]

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

[Yeah, the telepathy was definitely a good investment; Schuldig ducks because he doesn't need another concussion from Nagi.] Overreacting much?

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

[The point wasn't to hit him, just to prove his annoyance. Nagi will settle for shoving Schuldig backwards.]

Nobody else needs to know that.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

[Schuldig staggers back a step or two, then recovers, with a slight huff.] I didn't notice you being all that considerate about my losing an eye. [Beyond making sure he didn't bleed out. But they're not counting that, of course.]

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

I didn't tell the town and I kept you from bleeding to death. That's consideration enough.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Hah. You didn't have to tell the town; it was pretty obvious to anyone looking at me.

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

Exactly.

And looking at me shows that I don't have eyebrows, eyelashes, or anything on my arms. That's enough for them to know.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Then what are you so upset about? I didn't exactly go into detail. Anyone able to infer where else you might have lost hair from my comment would infer it just from the way you look, too.

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

Between that and you telling Crawford how much I lost, people could easily know more than they need to about me. I'd give my uniform back, but this place would probably give it back when I least want it.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

I suppose that's something approaching sense. I still don't see why you care what anyone does or doesn't know about you, though. It's not like they matter.

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

I have to deal with some of them at school as long as I'm here.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

So break their necks if they laugh. It's not as though anyone could even prove it was you.

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

I'd rather not be brainwashed again, but some will die anyway.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Murder doesn't always seem to result in droning, anyway. I killed you and didn't get droned, did I?

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but killing a lot of annoying high schoolers might get too much attention.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

It's never stopped us before, has it?

[bittermayfly.livejournal.com]

I'd rather not attract attention while I'm trying to research.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Hah. When have you ever wanted to attract attention, Nagi? You leave that to me and Farfarello.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

Lost his hair, hmm? My my, the post office is more dastardly than I thought.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Amusingly enough, he didn't lose the hair on his head. [Can you tell Schuldig is incredibly entertained by this? Because he's terrible at hiding it.]

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

[Joshua lets out an incredibly amused giggle. Schuldig's not the only one terrible at hiding it.]

Really? He should consider himself lucky. Plenty of people would pay big money for that kind of service.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

It's too bad there's no reliable way to tailor your results at the post office, or all the housewives would be going there.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

If it was that easy, I wouldn't mind making a few trades myself, hee hee. Did your friend at least get back something valuable?

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Mind if I ask what you'd get back?

A school uniform. And he wonders why I'm never going to let him hear the end of it.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

My cellphone would be a nice start. I doubt I'd be able to get much more in exchange for hair.

Oh~? As much as I deplore of the fashion here, that does seem like quite a waste of a trip.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

What good would it do you to have it with no one to call? Unless it can somehow connect to the phone network here, I suppose, but even then...it's not as though much of significance ever gets talked about, so you don't miss much by not listening in all the time. [This is easy for the telepath to say, of course.]

He claims he was just doing it as a test, but I think he was afraid to risk the price of anything bigger.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

Let's just say that my phone has some particularly unique features and leave it at that, shall we? Besides, I'm tired of having to wait to get my pictures developed, and the drones tend to give me rather dirty looks when they hand the photos back to me.

He can't have anything worth that much in the first place if he's not willing to pay a fee for it.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Oh, really. [Joshua can no doubt hear the intrigue in his voice, and you can bet Schuldig's trying to skim some details from his mind.]

You'd think, wouldn't you? I never regretted my trade, and now I've got my eye back anyway which makes the exchange even better than it was before.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

[He can't tell when someone's scanning him or not from this distance, but he can hazard a guess. Joshua makes an amused sound and brings up the images of a statue of a dog and a crowded scramble crossing just in case - if Schuldig's ever been to Shibuya, he'll recognize them.] Mmm. But the camera function's what I miss the most.

Congratulations. Unfortunately, the post thought it'd be funny to take away the memories of how to use what it gave back to me, so I won't be trying that again for a while.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

[This of course doesn't tell Schuldig much, whether he recognizes the location or not...which was probably the point. A low laugh and a telepathic whisper of Well played is Joshua's response.] And just what's so special about having a camera? I can't say I'm particularly crazy about the scenery here.

Typical. This place has terrible service.

[rulethegame.livejournal.com]

The scenery might not be interesting, but the people certainly are. And it's easier to break denials when one has proof, hmm~?

Doesn't it? I certainly won't be leaving any tips here.

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

Looking for blackmail? I never have a shortage of that, but then I don't need a camera for it.

A nasty note to the management is in order, at the very least. And I'll be taking my business elsewhere at the earliest opportunity.